OMG it’s me with Jill Stein!

This was earlier this year, when Dr. Stein spoke at the GPNJ convention. I look like a complete idiot, but I was so excited to meet her.

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Why do so many liberals still seem to think Obamacare is a success?

Precisely no one thinks Obamacare is a success. Anything that leaves millions still uninsured is not, by any reasonable accounting, a “success.” “Obamacare” isn’t what liberals called for in the first place. Some liberals see it for what it actually is: a handout to the insurance industry which was the only sort of healthcare reform the Obama administration could ever hope of getting past Republicans in Congress.

As it turns out, the handout system the insurance industry, and its bought-and-paid-for congressmen wanted hasn’t worked out the way they wanted, so now they’re attempting to paint it as a Great Liberal Catastrophe.

As various other answers note, what we now call “Obamacare” was, in fact, a conservative plan, back when the Heritage Foundation first proposed it. (How the Heritage Foundation, a Conservative Think Tank, Promoted the Individual Mandate)

Heritage can stamp its feet and whine all it wants now, but the centerpiece of what we got was an individual mandate for health insurance. This was supposed to be a band-aid on a broken system. When Heritage was first promoting it, back in the early 90’s, it was promised to be the better alternative to comprehensive, universal healthcare funded by taxes, or “socialized medicine” in the parlance of hair-on-fire conservatives.

What actual liberals wanted, what most of us still want, is single payer.

Original question on Quora:

Why do so many liberals still seem to think Obamacare is a success?

What is your real feeling to be a vegetarian?

I’m not exactly clear what the OP is asking.

How does it feel to be vegetarian? It feels like I don’t eat animals. I don’t feel different, or worse, than when I was 14 or 15 and still eating birds. I feel like me. Some days are good; some days aren’t. Some days I gorge on cashew milk ice cream and feel fat. Some days I don’t.

I’m a vegetarian for ethical reasons, so any touted health benefits are largely secondary, and I’m realistic enough to realize that lots of diets can be healthy, and that vegetarianism, by itself, isn’t a cure-all. I don’t particularly care about health benefits. I’ll take ‘em, but they’re not why I’m doing any of this.

Being a vegetarian, at this point, feels ordinary. I’ve been one for far longer than I wasn’t, so that shouldn’t be surprising.

Original question on Quora:

What is your real feeling to be a vegetarian?

My boyfriend gets upset when I tell him that I feel a certain way about our relationship. What do I do?

I’ll echo Katie Anne Holton’s typically excellent answer, here.

When The Husband and I got together, he was a huge fan of telling me what I think or feel. He was also a huge fan of the word “should.”

“You should feel x about y.”

“You should be happy about <blah>”

I responded, without yelling at him, without accusing him, but persistently:

“You may think I should, but I don’t. Now what?”

…until he got the message. To his very great credit, when we disagreed when we were dating, he paid attention to the difference in my phrasing vs. his. He’s learned – quickly! – to make “I-statements” instead of “you-statements.”

You can do this, too.

You didn’t tell your boyfriend how you feel. You told him what he feels. He didn’t reject you – you felt rejected. That’s not the same thing. “I feel like you don’t want x” is not the same thing as “I feel sad / hurt / angry when x happens.”

Your boyfriend is calling bullshit on the way you phrased that because you don’t get to tell him what he thinks or what he feels – only he does. Similarly, only you can tell other people what you think about a given thing.

If it was me, I’d have said, “I felt sexually rejected last Thursday.” …and then I’d see how he responded. If he’s anything like The Husband, he may have defaulted himself to a should-statement. “You shouldn’t feel that way.”

“Well, okay, you think I shouldn’t, but I do.”

No more than that. No argument. Just persistence. Tell him how you feel, and no more than that, until the two of you can actually work out a compromise that works for you both.

Original question on Quora:

My boyfriend gets upset when I tell him that I feel a certain way about our relationship. What do I do?